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eBook When It's Time to Leave Your Lover ePub

eBook When It's Time to Leave Your Lover ePub

by Neil Kaminsky

  • ISBN: 1560239387
  • Category: Social Sciences
  • Subcategory: Politics
  • Author: Neil Kaminsky
  • Language: English
  • Publisher: Routledge; 1 edition (September 12, 1999)
  • Pages: 306
  • ePub book: 1529 kb
  • Fb2 book: 1226 kb
  • Other: txt lrf mbr lit
  • Rating: 4.1
  • Votes: 344

Description

When It's Time to Leav.

When It's Time to Leav. You will discover how to When It's Time to Leave Your Lover: A Guide for Gay Men is for people who need help ending a gay male relationship that is no longer viable or for friends and family who want to support a gay man experiencing a breakup. This book provides tips on how to successfully cope with the post-breakup period and how to grow emotionally from the experience. You will discover how to tell a lover good-bye while learning about the psychological and social changes to be anticipated in this situation. Details (if other): Cancel. Thanks for telling us about the problem. When It's Time to Leave Your Lover: A Guide for Gay Men. by. Neil Kaminsky.

Early on in the book, author Neil Kaminsky asks the reader to examine reasons both in favor of and against . This book helped me immensely when it came time to part ways with my boyfriend.

Early on in the book, author Neil Kaminsky asks the reader to examine reasons both in favor of and against splitting up. A number of reasons address the homophobia of today's world and how this homophobia creates pressures on a gay couple either to stay together or break up, depending on the particular circumstances and people involved. There is also a very valuable questionnaire to help the reader decide what is the proper course to take. It's really geared toward people who know they want out of a problematic relationship, but are having difficulty owning up to their feelings.

When is it Time to Leave Your Lover. Published by Thriftbooks. com User, 19 years ago. This book is incredibly useful,VERY well written with caring, meaningful(even humorous situational examples at times), it's examples are thoughtful & at times difficult, but with helpful questions. This book is incredibly useful,VERY well written with caring, meaningful(even humorous situational examples at times), it's examples are thoughtful & at times difficult, but with helpful questions

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constructively leaving your partner and making it a positive experience. coping with the uncoupling experience by using specific techniques to avoid common mistakes such as the rebound relationship. growing from your uncoupling experience so you can enjoy more fulfilling relationships in the future.

May 20, 2019 History. When It's Time to Leave Your Lover.

A valuable and reader-friendly book, When It's Time to Leave Your Lover will enhance your understanding of the break-up experience and will help you understand, learn from, and get past the heartache of ending a relationship.

it's no wonder it's why I need a visor, 'cause y'all are just suns in my eyes Born a cynic and more demented than an orphanage with a morgue up in it Next door to an abortion clinic Newborn infants tortured and tormented With their.

it's no wonder it's why I need a visor, 'cause y'all are just suns in my eyes Born a cynic and more demented than an orphanage with a morgue up in it Next door to an abortion clinic Newborn infants tortured and tormented With their foreheads dented when they drop 'cause the floor's cemented Their corpses get ornamented Th. I thought I heard a voice in my head that said "Kill" I had no other choice that was left except fill My pencil full of poisonous lead, the devil He wants me to murder this beat, so I will He told me there are doubters who question my skill They wanna put my style to the test, am I still.

When It's Time to Leave Your Lover: A Guide for Gay Men is for people who need help ending a gay male relationship that is no longer viable or for friends and family who want to support a gay man experiencing a breakup. This book provides tips on how to successfully cope with the post-breakup period and how to grow emotionally from the experience. You will discover how to tell a lover good-bye while learning about the psychological and social changes to be anticipated in this situation. When It's Time to Leave Your Lover gives you helpful, practical advice on how to cope with ending a relationship in a positive and constructive manner.This unique book contains actual interviews with gay men and vignettes that clearly illustrate the topics. They provide you with a deeper understanding of all aspects of the break-up period. When It's Time to Leave Your Lover is a unique how-to book that gives you helpful and practical advice on such important issues as: making an assessment of your relationship to determine if it is no longer viable constructively leaving your partner and making it a positive experience coping with the uncoupling experience by using specific techniques to avoid common mistakes such as the rebound relationship growing from your uncoupling experience so you can enjoy more fulfilling relationships in the future managing the social and psychological effects of a breakup through use of your support system of family and friends seeking support through specific organizations available in several different cities that help gay men deal with breakupsSincere and full of knowledgeable advice, When It's Time to Leave Your Lover offers proven suggestions that will help you revisit the mistakes you made during your relationship, preparing you for more satisfying relationships in the future that are based on compatibility, respect, and trust. A valuable and reader-friendly book, When It's Time to Leave Your Lover will enhance your understanding of the break-up experience and will help you understand, learn from, and get past the heartache of ending a relationship.

Comments

Chilele Chilele
You may wonder about my negative title given the five star rating. Oh, the book written by Neil Kaminsky, a licensed clinical social worker who has worked in two states, is very, very well written. His work with multiple gay men who have had break ups as well as couples working issues helped him right a good book with a nice balance of advice and examples. However then I noticed the price on Amazon and the book itself -- you are paying a lot less on Amazon but still for a paperback book of less than 300 pages that was published in 1999 it is an outrageous amount. Don't blame Kaminsky though, he'll make very little in royalties. Instead I advise you to go and find this book in a library and read it.
Anarus Anarus
This book helped me immensely when it came time to part ways with my boyfriend. It's really geared toward people who know they want out of a problematic relationship, but are having difficulty owning up to their feelings. Kaminsky explains why wanting to be happy should not make readers feel guilty, helps identify the factors that contribute to troubled relationships, and shows readers how to avoid repeating their relationship mistakes in the future. The tone is hopeful and Kaminsky is an incredibly engaging writer, informal without over-simplifying. I recommend it without reservation!
Lanadrta Lanadrta
There is certainly no shortage of books dealing with breaking up with a partner. Since the majority of these books are pitched to a partner in a heterosexual relationship, including of course a married partner, this book fills a significant gap, beginning with the opening case study of a breakup between two long-time lovers that probably never would have occurred in quite this way in the heterosexual world.

Early on in the book, author Neil Kaminsky asks the reader to examine reasons both in favor of and against splitting up. A number of reasons address the homophobia of today's world and how this homophobia creates pressures on a gay couple either to stay together or break up, depending on the particular circumstances and people involved. There is also a very valuable questionnaire to help the reader decide what is the proper course to take. The book by no means takes the tack that breaking up is always the best course, although of course it is ultimately written to the one who comes to the conclusion that breaking up is the appropriate action.

The book goes on to discuss means of putting proper closure on the relationship, first citing several examples of partners ending relationships with little or in some cases no closure. I'm not certain I agree with his advice that several discussions may be needed, as I personally believe that most of it can be handled it a single thorough discussion and that prolonging the discussions will mostly serve to create false hope in the former partner. Kaminsky goes on to discuss some of the pain, both internal and societally imposed, that is going to result from the breakup.

Some of the most valuable, albeit short, sections of the book have to do with leaving a partner who is chemically addicted and physically abusive, noting that these two things often go hand-in-hand and that such relationships can literally kill the victim of the abuse. Particularly striking is the sentence (which I'm quoting from memory here, although I think it's pretty accurate) "Either the problem, the relationship or you end."

Throughout the book, the author avoid a "one-size-fits-all" approach. Thus, when he talks about creating an "ex-relationship" with the former partner, he acknowledges that in certain cases, once again mostly having to do with chemical dependency and physical abuse, such an ex-relationship should be avoided at all costs.

From there, Kaminsky goes on to discuss the rebound relationship which is almost always doomed to failure. The concluding chapters put the final cap on things by discussing the lessons to be learned from the former relationship, and how to start over again.

I found, certainly not because of any flaw in the book itself, some sections to be more helpful than others. Having recently ended a relationship that involved (surprise) alcohol and drug dependency and physical abuse on the part of my partner, I read those five or six pages scattered throughout the book over and over again. I imagine I needed reasurrance that looking out for my own safety was paramount. And because I was way past the point of being ready to end the relationship when I finally screwed up the courage (thanks in no small part to having read and studied this book) actually to do it, I have spent little time reading the chapters talking about the pain I would have to work through. Those chapters would have been of much more benefit to me a couple of years ago, when I was not yet emotionally prepared to leave. At this point, I would have found a chapter on "relief" probably much more useful (I say only partly tongue-in-cheek).

I highly recommend this book to any gay man who may think that it is time to end his relationship. It helps the reader objectively to look at the pros and cons of doing so. And then, for the reader who decides that it is indeed time to move on, it is very useful in helping him to work through the things that are undoubtedly going to come up in the months following the breakup.
Sironynyr Sironynyr
This book is incredibly useful,VERY well written with caring, meaningful(even humorous situational examples at times), it's examples are thoughtful & at times difficult, but with helpful questions. About the first 1/3 helps one reassess compatibility; next 1/3 how to separate or breakup with civility {including dealings with friends & family}; and lastly offers hope/suggestions for how to re-establish one's life again with tips how not to get caught in rebound relationships; suggestions for how to rebuild yourself, your interests, believe in your strengths & others; and how to grow and learn - even from being alone with your self which is different from being lonely. I highly recommend it. I wish it was reviewed more prominently by the gay press. It's a SUPERB resource for HOPE, ENCOURAGEMENT & Help! It also has a thorough reference/referral list.